A BipolarQuote by Alyssa Reyans, Letters From A Bipolar Mother

This quote resonates with me so much. Inside my head, I can hear my ‘true’ self screaming YES!!! Finally someone totally gets it… I am not completely alone in this world. I’m not as rare as I once thought.

Truly!

After my last mental health breakdown… which was a culmination of several years ranging from 2008 until about 2017. I often thought “who the f*ck am I? Will I ever get me back? Am I lost for good? Was the “me” I use to be the real one, or was I this person all along?

I now have the answer to those questions because for the first time in years, I look into that mirror, and with tears, I see who it was I loved… I see myself again. I see the compassion, and love, I see the person that others came to know and love. I lost myself to this cruel disorder. The shell of me, because of the bipolar 1 disorder that ran rampant like a wildfire in my head, that girl who I couldn’t stand looking at… that person was now gone. I hope she never returns, and I strive each day to move forward in love for myself, and the knowledge that I have gained from my painful life experiences.

The pain is like a fire, a cleansing fire… and I fight, continue on, creating new moments, and holding on to the opportunity to fix things that went wrong. I am healing daily, and want to help those who love me and have been hurt by me… they need healing as well, we all need healing, and I will do all I can to help…

That is love… and I am love. <— notice the positive affirmation I snuck in?? -smile- being positive does rewire your brain, and the more positive affirmations I can sneak into my life, the better!

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Quote For May 1, 2019

Grab hold of life with both hands and make the most of every single day. Everyone’s best will not look the same, so don’t compare yourself to others. Just resolve to do the best you can within your limitations… Remove all preconceived expectations (for frustration is expectation going unmet)… Don’t become stagnant, instead focus on continuously learning something new… Put mindfulness to practice where it will benefit you, as it is highly successful in testing mood disorders and chronic pain… And continue growing in passion for yourself to live your best life!

Always be open to living… this one life is all that we know to exist, there is no other. So get to living your best life and becoming the very best you!

“I Am Not Afraid…”~ Joan Of Arc

bornForThis

Bipolar Ord3r~ I was born to do this♥

 

Every day is a new day to bring happiness into our lives. It isn’t always the easiest thing to do … even  more-so when you battle mental health issues, but with patience, persistence, a sense of humor, and the desire to make life better with each day, it can be done!

Let go of that which you have no control~ Learn to go with the flow, life is ever changing~ Be kind to yourself, see your beauty INSIDE, and LOVE yourSELF~ Smile, it is contagious~ Laugh out loud, it is even more contagious~ When you lack kindness, don’t speak~ Point out one good thing about yourself daily, and say what that is out-loud while looking yourself in the eyes~~~ When having a bad day, remember the graceful pre-teen who faced cancer bravely, whose moniker was “makeup is my wig”, all the while bringing encouragement, love, happiness, grace, and a beaming smile to others… up until her last breath~~~ Do what you do with your whole heart in it, your passion will encourage others!

LIVE, THRIVE, CRY, EMBRACE the SUCK, and no matter what, NEVER EVER GIVE UP… you are worth all the effort. Don’t let life slip by, EXPERIENCE it with an open mind and with your heart “all in”… afterall, we only have THIS life to live, so get to living it! ♥

Fuck Bipolar Disorder… Bipolar ORDER is how I roll~

©thebipolarmuse 2018

Set Yourself On Fire!

 

Success isn’t a result of spontaneous combustion. You must set yourself on fire.” ~Arnold H. Glasow

 

I want to live by this philosophy! How many times will I allow myself to be burned by not following through and completing something. I set goals, perhaps too many, and make them completely unattainable. Would that just be a part of who I am?

As a child I wanted to be rich and famous…. how attainable is that?

My Father too was unable to complete anything. He couldn’t be what he needed for me and my sister. A complete asshole by my definition, yet I struggle and miss him. I still love him and long for him… though it can never be. Sadly he died in 2004. Every option of knowing him, forgiving him, telling him “I love you” was removed from me. I desperately would love for him to know that I have grown and learned the important lesson of loving without the expectation of anything being returned.

I love you Dad… and I hope you fell into eternal sleep with peace and sweet dreams of Starr and me.♥

©thebipolarmuse2010

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Written in April 2010