How Is It Fair??

birdsDarkness

How is it fair?

I never knew I would love…

Dream, or Breathe,

The way I do You.

Can I sleep in peace?

I never knew I would hope,

Cry, or pray for dreamless nights,

The way I do because of you.

How is it Fair…

To be buried above ground,

where sadness surrounds,

And to be uncomfortable in your own skin?

How is it fair…

You’re buried six feet down.

Sleeping so peaceful, so sound…

And I can’t be found in the world

You are in?

How is it fair??

©thebipolarmuse2003

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** Written many many years ago after the death of my ex-boyfriend, Fiance at one point in time… by his own hand.

Suicide is NEVER the answer. If you or someone you know are contemplating suicide, please reach out for help. Suicide hotlines offer a caring ear, and also have many resources to direct one in the right direction for help. You are not alone in your feelings… remember, this too shall pass and suicide is a permanent, destructive choice that cannot be taken back. Seek help. Choose life. ♥

Call 1-800-273-8255 National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

A Moment In Stillness

instillness

 

It is amazing how long it can take some people to figure things out… To end their misery. I have told myself over and over that “nobody can make me happy… Only I can”.

Though I have spoken those words to myself aloud and otherwise… it was not until today that I said it out loud, and it became an “aha” moment.

It finally hit me… it empowered me!

This feeling was all new to me… a moment in stillness that reverberated through me.

Why? Because it means the difference between a miserable existence and a happy one.

I always believed that happiness could be sought, and found, through relationships… relationships with loved ones, and friends…relationships with men… but in all honesty, this is faulty thinking.

While relationships are important for us to feel fulfilled, they are NOT to be relied upon to make you happy. We should not put expectations of that magnitude onto others, and we should begin looking inwards.

Now, I am not saying we should be self-centered and make life all about “me, me, me”… that is unhealthy, ugly, self-serving behavior that creates only more pain and heartache, it certainly does not create happiness. Our happiness is ours to create… each of us personally needs to learn who we are, we need to become passionate for ourselves and passionate about what makes our hearts happy. That responsibility resides with nobody but ourselves.

As they say, happiness is a journey, not a destination. Don’t put off life… keep your eyes up and looking ahead, and be mindful while being here in the present.

For the present … well, the present is truly a gift.

©thebipolarmuse 2018

Big Thanks To “13 Reasons Why”

13-reasons-why

13 Reasons Why…

This t.v. series has started addressing the very serious issues happening to our teenagers across the world. They address sexual assault, gay bashing, bullying, cyber bullying, physical fights, sexuality, blackmail, coercion, our court system, and the way victims are turned into villian’s and worse. They also address the glorified hierarchy of the jocks occurring in schools everywhere, relationships, and of course the insecurities that all teenagers seem to possess to some degree.

These are all very worthy causes to bring to light and begin a conversation. However, for me, I not only applaud them for all the reasons I mentioned, but I applaud them for addressing these 2 things…

School shootings, and suicide.

Not only do they address suicide, but they also show what the aftermath of such a tragic choice does to all those around you. It shows the example of ruined relationships, the sadness and anger it invokes, the way many people need to “blame” someone or something. They address the need to have an open conversation about suicide, and also the need to tone it down so it does not infiltrate the minds of “at risk” youth (and adults), and create a contagion affect.

13 Reasons Why begs us to open up a dialogue with those we care about and address these very serious issues. All of these topics are what MANY teenagers deal with. Adults don’t quite grasp what all the social media can do to our children… how it opens one up to being bullied, how fake Facebook pages (or any other social media source) are set up to trick an unknowing person/victim. How taking a photo can lead to disaster… especially if it is provocative in any way, or a rumor presented along with it. Often, very detrimental consequences follow. Not to mention that many violators get away with what they do.

Many seemed to be concerned about the topics addressed during the 1st season… believing that young people cannot handle watching these issues, and didn’t think the show was good for teens to watch. This seems ridiculous to me considering all the “shooting” video games teenagers play,  not to mention the games younger kids play where they break into a neighbors house to try to discover what is in the basement… finally seeing that the neighbor is keeping people locked up against their will. WTF is that about??? Children are exposed to these types of games, and worse, but we cannot speak with them about suicide, bullying, sexual assault, and many more issues they deal with on a constant basis?? This is insanity.

This is the generation of overprotecting our kids to the point that they do not have the skills needed to take care of themselves, emotionally or otherwise. We are crippling them by doing this and it is truly sad.

So I applaud 13 Reasons Why, those in charge for creating the show, Netflix for embracing it, and the fight needed to bring about the second season and more… thank you for being the voice we all need.

©thebipolarmuse2018